Now I Know

Now I Know what the doctors meant when they told me that all that can be done now is concentrate on life changes and pain management. 

Its taken me 3 and a bit years to finally accept my situation and go through the grieving process  for the lost person that was me and the loss of all my life's skills and hobbies. Things i loved doing; my independence; My future as i used to be....

Its strange how a calmness now resides over what once was, and how i just now go with each new day without question; without fighting to get back to who i was, i now accept who i am and i now look forward with hope.

My pain will always be there, and my weakness will always rule what i am able to achieve, but the me that is now looks at each new day with the hope and awareness that i am alive, i am truly loved, and i am content to feel grateful for those things with a thankful heart.

I know that there will be days when i will struggle, and there will be times when i feel low and so very alone with my pain , but i own it now . It is mine and mine alone and so i need to cope in my own way . 

I share this illness with so many people and my only wish is .... let them find peace and a way to come to terms with what is now 

Looking forward .......
Hugs xx